I spent a good amount of time recently wondering if I should shut a particular door. I pleaded with friends. I questioned my yoga teacher. I asked my family. I asked myself, and I asked the door itself. "Should I shut you?"
I don't know if "I should/shouldn't" "She should/shouldn't" statements are the best ones to let churn around one's mind. I will, however, offer up my tiny little testimony: shut the door, sometimes you see doors that have always been there. You've just been to door-obsessed to notice how unique, simple, ornate, solid, and beautifully-made they always were.
OK, back to the "I" voice ;-) One of the doors I'm seeing more clearly lately is yoga. Each time I go, it's a transformation. The possibilities for progress are always there. In the Bikram blogging world, it's a cliche to write about how a class that is "the same every time" provides ample opportunity for different experiences.
Lately, I've been taking those 20-second savasanas to question my stressful thoughts that come up during class. We've all had the "It's too freakin' hot. The teacher should really turn it down" thought. So, when I notice that's coming up, when I see the students wilting like sad Icelandic poppies in gushing heat, when I see the puddle of sweat on my towel is abnormally large, I think about it. What are the ways it's not too hot? Let me count them :-) I can still feel my body, my heart rate slows when I'm not in the posture, I keep sweating, I keep thinking... etc.
It seriously works! I've had a couple of classes lately that were hotter than normal, but my experience in the room was much better than it "should" have been.
Ay, speaking of "should," I feel like I should come back to the door metaphor ;-) Take the time to look around, I guess. They are many doors that are already open. That much, I can promise.
A not wilty Icelandic Poppy
5 comments:
Cool perspective. Definitely going to think of ways its 'not hot' next time I'm wigging out in there.
Oh Elisa! This is so beautiful. I couldn't help but remember when we went to that haunted house when we were kids and you went through that door and it shut and you were left screaming in the dark on the other side. I'll never forget because no matter how scary that was, you were the first to open and go through that door where as the rest of us were too stone cold petrified.
Have I commented on your blog yet? I can't remember... Either way, I'm reading it.
And this post really speaks to me. There's a door I want to shut in my life, but I'm having trouble finding one to open. And so I'm left at a frustrating stand still. I suppose I should go to yoga more often?
Martina, that cracks me up. Oh my gosh, I forgot all about that. I went first and then y'all left me behind, hahahahha.
RathertheCouch, great question, and great subtitle for your blog! No idea what the answer is, but I know that for me, the decision just kinda... got made the moment I stopped obsessing about making it.
oh lady, i hear you loud and clear about the yoga. so many things that are never the same, but all for our growth. and those doors, well there's so many sometimes that we don't know how to choose.
haha with the change in weather, our teachers say that many students drop like flies or like wilting poppies (hee), even when it's not hot. so next time i wilt in class, i shall think of the coming of spring and smile :)
L
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