Anyone else occasionally get the sensation that they're just not breathing enough?
In the workshop I've been blogging about incessantly for the past couple of weeks, Esak focused a lot on breathing--pranyama, 80/20 breathing, and "holding the breath" when initially going into the postures. I had the realization today that in some classes I'm scared to breathe. What. The. Hell.
I walked into class tonight after a really busy day: classes, grading, workshops, errands, and then yoga. It had felt kind of like a marathon, and I was almost a little cocky that I was riding that wild horse of tasks so smoothly. The class really humbled me, and I could tell that the panicky feeling I was getting had nothing to do with my physical state of well-being. I was creating it. I was not exhaling and inhaling as much as I normally did.
The most troubling part of it all was that even when I realized I wasn't breathing enough, I couldn't get myself into a rhythm. Despite backing off the postures, I couldn't get back on track with the breath, and I began entering panic mode. And the most frustrating thing was that I couldn't blame it on lack of sleep, on what I ate, or what I didn't drink. It was all in my head.
The other most troubling part ;-) is thinking about where else in my life I'm not pulling enough air into the lungs. I think this idea is both literal and figurative--I can tense up and hold my breath, and I can mentally hold onto the day's events, to not let them go. In either case, not exhaling has consequences.
Back to yoga. When I'm feeling like I'm not breathing, first I'll try to gently bring awareness to that instead of focusing so intently on the posture. In worst-case scenarios, like today, I resort to singing, "Just breathe. It's gonna be OK," to the tune of that silly Lady Gaga song, "Just Dance."
Bringing up the Lady Gaga thing reminds me to be aware of my own... limits? Idiosyncrasies? Lady Gaga is... showy. Often inane. Not the most impressive musician on the planet. But her music is crack to me! Also, I keep a package of Trader Joe's oreos in the cupboard, just in case of an emergency. Also, I like the smell of skunks. Also, I can really, really get caught up in the day's herd of wild horses as they gallop on by.
But there's no need to. It's OK to acknowledge my own limits and tendencies, quirky as they might be. I can ride the horse when I need to, and hop off when I reach the destination. Just breathe, E.
Right??
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** what a constellation of topics this post has: breathing, Lady Gaga, a horse metaphor, and an admission that I like skunks. Can you tell my mind is all over the place? ;-)
Showing posts with label Esak Garcia. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Esak Garcia. Show all posts
Thursday, May 13, 2010
Monday, May 10, 2010
It's SUPERnatural.
I'm still riding a yoga high from attending Esak Garcia's workshop this past weekend. I got so much from this workshop that this will be, at best, a general overview. Later, I'm sure I'll share more about what I learned and how it's being incorporated into my general practice.
The day began at 9:00 with a class taught by Esak. He's a great teacher--precise, motivating, but in no way arrogant or showy. For some reason, what I remember most vividly from the class was his focus on ankles. In Pranyama deep breathing, especially when talking about contracting the thighs and buttocks, he mentioned the ankles. It felt odd to think about ankles contracting (is it humanly possible to bring those together? Not for me, anyway), but in doing so, I had awareness of my body from the head to the toes. One extra part of my body felt alive!
He also talked about ankles in Eagle pose--not just wrapping the ankle around, as the dialog states, but really squeezing the ankles together. I think that's a contraction that many overlook. Must remember that one!
One of my goals for the class was to make it through without skipping a posture. I didn't quite achieve that. It was an incredibly hot class, and I sat out a set of Triangle. Oh well. I'm actually not bothered by the fact that I sit out postures occasionally, so long as I know I'm working my max and not leaving the room. Not all expectations are met ;-)
OK, so, the posture clinic. I loved how Esak set it up. He didn't begin with a laundry list of postures to gloss over; he set it up according to higher concepts that he used the postures to illustrate. I won't go over every posture and list everything I remember from it all, but here is a general overview.
The first concept was breathing--I believe he used the term "breathing like a master playing guitar" to introduce it. Here, he focused on Pranyama (duh, and more on that one later) and Half-moon. He really de-mystified 80-20 breathing for me, and the clarity I got there was so needed.
The second concept was Hatha yoga (Hatha, the physical practice of yoga, translates to sun+moon. It's all about balance.) The third theme was backbending (lots of focus on identifying the thoracic part of the spine--Balancing Stick, Half-tortoise), and the fourth and final concept was Raja yoga, which was a little short due to time constraints. But at least there we talked about coming into the postures quickly, no fear--Camel, Standing Backward Bending and the second part of Awkward.
For now, I'll just talk about two posture insights I got. One was on flexing the foot in the second part of Standing Head-to-Knee. He had us really work on it. First, we practiced flexing the foot while it was on the floor and seeing the muscles above the shin come to life. Then, he had us hold the pose, foot kicked out, while he came around and ensured that we were all truly flexing it. It wasn't until he came over to me and poked at that muscle that the foot really flexed for the first time. Very cool "a-HA!" feeling on my part. It ain't easy to actually flex that foot--it's much more than pulling the toes back slightly.
I could see that it was not Esak's style to use himself as examples for what the postures "should" look like, and I liked this about him. He mainly used the students as examples (including me in Pranyama!), which allowed him to give them even more feedback. But, among others, he did demo Standing Head-to-Knee, and in doing so, he pointed out a truth about yoga (and life, as far as I'm concerned) that most people overlook. He said that to perfect this pose for a competition, his teacher (Mary Jarvis) had him do it ten times a day. Then, twenty. He said that before competing, "I did the pose of thousands of times."
Isn't that reassuring to hear? It's just practice. It's just time. I think we are engrained with this myth that mastery comes from innate talent or ability. But no. It's time spent. Certainly, some may have more natural flexibility than others, or a body type that makes certain poses easier than they might be for others, but like us all, Esak didn't improve until he did the pose again and again. Doesn't that bode well for the lot of us? :-)
(By the way, if the idea of mastery from practice vs. innate ability interests you, go buy Malcolm Gladwell's Outliers. He talks about this concept in detail.)
I also got a much deeper understanding about what happens and why in Pranyama. Esak talked a lot about the diaphragm and why sucking in the stomach helps. In part, we need to suck in the stomach because doing so compresses the internal organs, "allowing air to go into parts of the lungs that don't normally get used." I knew the second part, of course, but I hadn't thought of the internal organs getting squished down to make room for the extra air. Very cool. He asked me to demo the posture, and I was happy to hear that I was on the right track with it. As you know, it's really hard to keep the stomach sucked in when exhaling, but it can happen. Sort of.
It was at this point that Esak mentioned that what we do in yoga is not un-natural, it's supernatural. He was big on reminding us that in yoga, things do not always feel that great. There is often pain. Not injury, of course, but intense discomfort. Yoga goes beyond the everyday range of motion, taking what we do in everyday life to a higher (super) level. The extra air you pull into the lungs in Pranyama, the intense backward bending you do in Camel--we don't do that without making the effort and deciding to do so because it's needed.
So... make the effort. Put in those hours! And, finally, I'm done for now :-) It really feels like I'm just scratching the surface.
.jpg)
The day began at 9:00 with a class taught by Esak. He's a great teacher--precise, motivating, but in no way arrogant or showy. For some reason, what I remember most vividly from the class was his focus on ankles. In Pranyama deep breathing, especially when talking about contracting the thighs and buttocks, he mentioned the ankles. It felt odd to think about ankles contracting (is it humanly possible to bring those together? Not for me, anyway), but in doing so, I had awareness of my body from the head to the toes. One extra part of my body felt alive!
He also talked about ankles in Eagle pose--not just wrapping the ankle around, as the dialog states, but really squeezing the ankles together. I think that's a contraction that many overlook. Must remember that one!
One of my goals for the class was to make it through without skipping a posture. I didn't quite achieve that. It was an incredibly hot class, and I sat out a set of Triangle. Oh well. I'm actually not bothered by the fact that I sit out postures occasionally, so long as I know I'm working my max and not leaving the room. Not all expectations are met ;-)
OK, so, the posture clinic. I loved how Esak set it up. He didn't begin with a laundry list of postures to gloss over; he set it up according to higher concepts that he used the postures to illustrate. I won't go over every posture and list everything I remember from it all, but here is a general overview.
The first concept was breathing--I believe he used the term "breathing like a master playing guitar" to introduce it. Here, he focused on Pranyama (duh, and more on that one later) and Half-moon. He really de-mystified 80-20 breathing for me, and the clarity I got there was so needed.
The second concept was Hatha yoga (Hatha, the physical practice of yoga, translates to sun+moon. It's all about balance.) The third theme was backbending (lots of focus on identifying the thoracic part of the spine--Balancing Stick, Half-tortoise), and the fourth and final concept was Raja yoga, which was a little short due to time constraints. But at least there we talked about coming into the postures quickly, no fear--Camel, Standing Backward Bending and the second part of Awkward.
For now, I'll just talk about two posture insights I got. One was on flexing the foot in the second part of Standing Head-to-Knee. He had us really work on it. First, we practiced flexing the foot while it was on the floor and seeing the muscles above the shin come to life. Then, he had us hold the pose, foot kicked out, while he came around and ensured that we were all truly flexing it. It wasn't until he came over to me and poked at that muscle that the foot really flexed for the first time. Very cool "a-HA!" feeling on my part. It ain't easy to actually flex that foot--it's much more than pulling the toes back slightly.
I could see that it was not Esak's style to use himself as examples for what the postures "should" look like, and I liked this about him. He mainly used the students as examples (including me in Pranyama!), which allowed him to give them even more feedback. But, among others, he did demo Standing Head-to-Knee, and in doing so, he pointed out a truth about yoga (and life, as far as I'm concerned) that most people overlook. He said that to perfect this pose for a competition, his teacher (Mary Jarvis) had him do it ten times a day. Then, twenty. He said that before competing, "I did the pose of thousands of times."
Isn't that reassuring to hear? It's just practice. It's just time. I think we are engrained with this myth that mastery comes from innate talent or ability. But no. It's time spent. Certainly, some may have more natural flexibility than others, or a body type that makes certain poses easier than they might be for others, but like us all, Esak didn't improve until he did the pose again and again. Doesn't that bode well for the lot of us? :-)
(By the way, if the idea of mastery from practice vs. innate ability interests you, go buy Malcolm Gladwell's Outliers. He talks about this concept in detail.)
I also got a much deeper understanding about what happens and why in Pranyama. Esak talked a lot about the diaphragm and why sucking in the stomach helps. In part, we need to suck in the stomach because doing so compresses the internal organs, "allowing air to go into parts of the lungs that don't normally get used." I knew the second part, of course, but I hadn't thought of the internal organs getting squished down to make room for the extra air. Very cool. He asked me to demo the posture, and I was happy to hear that I was on the right track with it. As you know, it's really hard to keep the stomach sucked in when exhaling, but it can happen. Sort of.
It was at this point that Esak mentioned that what we do in yoga is not un-natural, it's supernatural. He was big on reminding us that in yoga, things do not always feel that great. There is often pain. Not injury, of course, but intense discomfort. Yoga goes beyond the everyday range of motion, taking what we do in everyday life to a higher (super) level. The extra air you pull into the lungs in Pranyama, the intense backward bending you do in Camel--we don't do that without making the effort and deciding to do so because it's needed.
So... make the effort. Put in those hours! And, finally, I'm done for now :-) It really feels like I'm just scratching the surface.
.jpg)
Esak Garcia, flexin' that foot
Thursday, May 6, 2010
No expectations! Well, maybe one or two...
Is it really possible to set aside our expectations for yoga? For me, it's a lofty ideal. It would be great to wake up and not think about what I want to happen--be it in my writing classes, when I go out to dinner, and, especially, with yoga.
I do strive to set those expectations aside in my practice, but with the Esak Garcia workshop coming up, I can't help but get a little excited and just hope certain things will occur. Maybe I could just reframe and call it "goal-setting" ;-)
The workshop begins with a class taught by Esak. Then, we have a short break, followed by a seminar/posture clinic/whatever that goes until 4:00. Goal #1: don't sit out any of the postures and just enjoy the class and new instructor.
I know it will be impossible for Esak to go over all 26 postures, and I'm sure I'll get a lot out of the discussion of whatever postures he chooses to discuss. Goal #2: appreciate insights into whatever he chooses to have us work on.
OK. My lofty "appreciate what's offered" ideal ends there. Here's what I want! I'm really hoping he has us work on Half-moon. I can't seem to get enough of teachers telling me not to get scared in Standing Backward Bend, and I've already posted about my curvy spine in Half-moon. I've never had a teacher single me out and tell me they could see I was capable of much more, but I know I'm capable of so much more. I can't seem to push myself enough here by adhering to the corrections given to the class. I need to kiss my fear of those poses goodbye, and a little one-on-one might just do the trick.
There are other poses I feel a little... blank about. By blank I mean that I simply have no idea what I'm doing and wonder if I'm getting anything out of them. In Standing Separate Leg Head-to-knee pose I have no idea what my hips are doing, yet the dialogue is specific about "right hip forward, left hip back." I'm also afraid of injuring myself on the forward bends, so Seated and Standing Separate Leg Stretching poses would be great to work on.
That said, regardless of what Esak chooses to do, I'm really looking forward to the workshop and spending a whole day on yoga. I'm going to take lots of notes, bring a camera, and hang out wiht my mat buddy. Only 20 people or so have registered at this point, so we should get some individual attention. You know I will share any insights I gain from this!
I do strive to set those expectations aside in my practice, but with the Esak Garcia workshop coming up, I can't help but get a little excited and just hope certain things will occur. Maybe I could just reframe and call it "goal-setting" ;-)
The workshop begins with a class taught by Esak. Then, we have a short break, followed by a seminar/posture clinic/whatever that goes until 4:00. Goal #1: don't sit out any of the postures and just enjoy the class and new instructor.
I know it will be impossible for Esak to go over all 26 postures, and I'm sure I'll get a lot out of the discussion of whatever postures he chooses to discuss. Goal #2: appreciate insights into whatever he chooses to have us work on.
OK. My lofty "appreciate what's offered" ideal ends there. Here's what I want! I'm really hoping he has us work on Half-moon. I can't seem to get enough of teachers telling me not to get scared in Standing Backward Bend, and I've already posted about my curvy spine in Half-moon. I've never had a teacher single me out and tell me they could see I was capable of much more, but I know I'm capable of so much more. I can't seem to push myself enough here by adhering to the corrections given to the class. I need to kiss my fear of those poses goodbye, and a little one-on-one might just do the trick.
There are other poses I feel a little... blank about. By blank I mean that I simply have no idea what I'm doing and wonder if I'm getting anything out of them. In Standing Separate Leg Head-to-knee pose I have no idea what my hips are doing, yet the dialogue is specific about "right hip forward, left hip back." I'm also afraid of injuring myself on the forward bends, so Seated and Standing Separate Leg Stretching poses would be great to work on.
That said, regardless of what Esak chooses to do, I'm really looking forward to the workshop and spending a whole day on yoga. I'm going to take lots of notes, bring a camera, and hang out wiht my mat buddy. Only 20 people or so have registered at this point, so we should get some individual attention. You know I will share any insights I gain from this!
Thursday, April 8, 2010
Everyone in the room! Listen!
I felt like I needed to post something a little more uplifting than my last, even if it's only for myself :-)
I got a cool burst of insight in class today. The teacher gave a correction to someone named, say, Sean, in Cobra. "Bring your elbows back more, Sean, elbows more back." Then, I heard her say, "Why you looking at me, Jorge? Look at yourself and just listen to the correction. If I correct Sean, you do the correction to. Everyone in the room, listen and incorporate the correction."
For some reason, that instruction made me really happy. Even if my elbows are already back in the pose, it doesn't hurt to bring awareness there and possibly reach a new level of deepness in my own pose. The instruction reminded me that we're all connected in the practice. We do the same poses, as much in unison as possible, and in that sense we are one. Kinda sorta like we are in life :-)
On another note, I'm so excited and proud that my studio is hosting a posture clinic with Esak Garcia next month! I'm definitely planning to attend. I've recently been wishing a studio in the area would offer a posture clinic--I'm ready to work out some of the kinks and misalignments I'm sure I've accumulated as I've settled into the practice.
I got a cool burst of insight in class today. The teacher gave a correction to someone named, say, Sean, in Cobra. "Bring your elbows back more, Sean, elbows more back." Then, I heard her say, "Why you looking at me, Jorge? Look at yourself and just listen to the correction. If I correct Sean, you do the correction to. Everyone in the room, listen and incorporate the correction."
For some reason, that instruction made me really happy. Even if my elbows are already back in the pose, it doesn't hurt to bring awareness there and possibly reach a new level of deepness in my own pose. The instruction reminded me that we're all connected in the practice. We do the same poses, as much in unison as possible, and in that sense we are one. Kinda sorta like we are in life :-)
On another note, I'm so excited and proud that my studio is hosting a posture clinic with Esak Garcia next month! I'm definitely planning to attend. I've recently been wishing a studio in the area would offer a posture clinic--I'm ready to work out some of the kinks and misalignments I'm sure I've accumulated as I've settled into the practice.
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